Good Ol' Maine Humor...

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Muthah Gets a New Carpet

One day Muthuh says, "I'm tired of this old shag carpeting. Can't we get some of that nice new close-knap stuff they're selling down at the K-maht?"

Well, there's nothing I want more than to keep Muthuh happy. Unfortunately, even the K-mart wanted a lot of money for that new carpetin'- more that I've got! So, I got to thinking, What can I do to make our carpeting more inviting to Muthuh? And then it came to me! Maybe the best idea I've ever had.

I waited until Muthuh went shopping at her favorite store, Chez Reny, in Gardiner proper. I new she'd be gone for a couple of hours - so I went right to work. I dragged our rotary lawn mower into the livin room, set her as low as she would go and fired that baby up.

The first thing I did was to mow that long shag carpeting down real short. And then, to add a special touch that I knew Muthuh would just love, I mowed the Red Sox logo right into the carpet on the floor in front of our new big screen TV.

Muthuh got home and soon the blue haze cleared out of the trailer (caused by the two cycle lawn mower we scored at a lawn sale last summer). Being a good Maine woman and a staunch Sox fan, she loved her new present! We sat down with some cold Moxie, Muthuh's whoopie pies and watched the Red Sox whip the Yankees - It just don't git no better than that!

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